I think in recent years feminism has come leaps and bounds. It's become a much more accepted thing and I think more people feel comfortable about telling people they view themselves as a feminist. However, saying that I think that when you tell people you're a feminist or talk to people of feminism their minds automatically go to one of the following.

1. All feminists are women:
   I think when people hear the word feminism, they hear 'fem' and automatically assume that it's just for females and female rights. The actual definition of feminism is about having equality of the sexes, it isn't all about women although that can be a big part of it. As a feminist I personally feel that EVERYONE deserves to feel safe, happy and comfortable with who they are and the life they lead.
2. All feminists hate men and think women are better than men:
   This is a huge misconception that I know so many people who don't understand feminism have. I don't hate men, at all and I count myself as straight so I certainly don't hate men. What I hate is ignorance, whether this is from men or women. I certainly don't believe that women are better than men, there is no way to judge whether someone else is better than the next. Radical feminists believe that male supremacy should be completely eliminated in all contexts of life, but a large majority don't count themselves as radical feminists anymore and believe that all men and women should be equal (equal being the key word).
3. Sexism isn't a problem anymore:
   Ofcourse sexism is nowhere near as bad as it used to be; we as women now have the vote, we can work and do just as much as any man can. However, saying this we still have so many areas in the world where we are complete behind on the times. Abortion is still considered a horrendous crime, child marriages are still the norm in so many countries, FGM is still happening and people still feel ashamed about coming forward about rape and abuse. There are still so many awful places in the world where feminism is needed. Feminism is needed for EVERYONE.
   
   

Dermatillomania- "Excoriation disorder is an impulse control disorder characterized by the repeated urge to pick at one's own skin" , it is also known as compulsive skin picking or CSP. The picking of the skin can take place in numerous different area's of the body and has been linked to obsessive compulsive disorder and shares similarities with trichotilliomania. 

In all honesty I hadn't actually heard of dermatillomania or CSP until a few years back, for me picking my skin was a completely natural and normal thing to do. I don't remember ever starting it, but I can't remember a time of not doing it. For me it's just always been there and I've always considered it to be a completely normal thing and I would just sit and do it without even realizing; it confused and grossed out a lot of people and I never understood why and would get quite upset when people would get annoyed at me for doing it because I didn't understand what I was doing wrong. 

Even when discovering what this thing I did was, it didn't actually stop me or slow me down in doing it and I'd still do it when I felt a particularly large amount of negative emotion; anger, anxiety, sadness, frustration or even boredom a lot of the time. If I'm being honest with you, there was no moment of realisation where I went "RIGHT, I need to stop this!" and I still haven't reached that point because for me personally I think it will take a long time for me to fully stop. However, compared to the rate and amount that I used to do it I have greatly improved. I used to pick my skin, every day; there was not a day I wouldn't do it. A lot of people thought that I would just pick my arms and shoulders, in actual fact I would pick my arms, shoulders, chest, face, neck, head, knee's and my thighs.

Nowadays, I pick a couple of times a week and that's usually because I'm bored, frustrated, upset etc. Although you're probably thinking "well that's still not great" considering how much I used to do it, this is an extreme improvement for me because what a lot of people don't understand is how hard it really is to stop something you can't even remember starting. The way I explain it to people who don't understand is like this if you smoke, drink, take drugs or eat food and you are particularly addicted to one of these things you are unable to willingly stop that is how I feel. It isn't that I don't want to stop; if I could have beautifully smooth and scar free arms then I would 110%. It is not as easy as that, I can't just wake up one day and say "I am never going to pick again" and then stop for the rest of my life. 

If you suffer with CSP, trichotilliomania, dermatillomania or any other problem that makes you feel bad about yourself and the way you look. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this, you are such a strong person and you aren't alone. I find a lot of methods don't work for me; the best one for me is honestly when I'm tanned or I've had the sun on my arms for a long time as I find that the heat helps to settle the scarring and any imperfections I can see that I want to pick, I can't tell you why but for me it just works. You may find that something different works for you. In all honesty you just need to trying and seeing what works best for you. I also use my nails so I find if I'm going through a particularly bad spell I will cut my nails off or get fake nails (I find it impossible to pick with fake nails on). 

The last thing I am going to say if you suffer with CSP; don't feel ashamed. Don't feel embarrassed or weird because it isn't your fault and don't let anyone tell you it is, it can't be helped. If you're patient you will eventually find a way to get better with it or stop it all together and if you do good for you and if you are still fighting with it now then you are not a failure and don't give up! 
If you suffer with ANY type of problem whether it be dermatillomania, trichotilliomania, CSP, OCD, BDD or if you're just having a bad day and don't suffer with anything and just want to moan then you can tweet me, or find my email in the side bar. I'm happy to talk and just listen if you need to chat with someone who has an outsiders perspective then I will reply ASAP. 

I hope this has been helpful for some of you and eye opening for the rest of you! 

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I thought that as I haven't blogged at all this year I'd give you all a bit of a catch up as to whats been going on in my life, and then give a few facts about myself for any of you that might be new to my blog!

2016 so far has involved: 1 hen do, 3 weddings, my 21st birthday and a joint birthday party, another holiday to Greece, 1 mini holiday to Paris, a festival, many MANY nights out, seeing Adele and Coldplay live, starting my degree and a number of other little occasions and days out with friends.

My 21st birthday party was brilliant and everyone had an amazing time and going to Greece again after last year was lovely. After visiting Rhodes last year we decided to try out a different area of Greece and settled on Crete which was equally as beautiful as all the other areas of Greece I'd previously visited and I'd definitely recommend to everyone!

A small collage of a few things I've been up to in 2016!

After deciding to give university a miss and get a job straight away instead when I finished college, I slowly started to realise that I actually did really want to get a degree and that was the whole reason I went to sixth form. I've always wanted to teach English and so at the beginning of this year, I finally decided that I wanted to start working towards my English degree, so since the beginning of this year I've been working towards that part time through the open university!

For any of you that are new to my blog or began following me whilst I was M.I.A, have 10 facts about me that you may or may not know.

1. I've never liked my name, but I love my middle name which is why my blog and all my usernames on social media platforms is AshleighRhiane. 
2. I have a huge phobia of all insects. It doesn't matter how big or small they are, how many legs they have and whether or not they can fly. They all terrify me.
3. I was in choir for around 8 years and sometimes I really miss it.
4. I got my ears pierced at 14-15 by my friend, she used 2 safety pins... it wasn't pretty...
5. When I'm really sad, I listen to Disney music. It always helps.
6. If I could speak any other language, I'd choose Swedish. I've always loved how it looks and sounds, its amazing!
7. When I was 6 I wanted to be an archaeologist, I was a strange child. 
8.  A French man was impressed with how much wine I could drink. If that's not impressive then I don't know what is. 
9. So far I've been to Spain 3 times, Greece 2 times, Turkey 2 times, America, Paris and Portugal and there are still so many different places I want to see!
10. I've always wanted to be a Disneyland princess, but then I found out I'm not tall enough.I'm still not over it...

Hiiiiiiiii,
so it's been a while hasn't it? I've got to apologize, because if you read my last post (around this time last year...) I said that I was going to try and start posting again. Well, that clearly didn't happen did it.

This past year has been INSANE.
There's been a few ups and many downs and things have completely changed in my life, I almost feel like I'd taken 3 step forward and now I've taken about 10 steps back. I'm not ready to explain in detail what these changes have been, but I'm sure I'll explain in another post at some point.

The fact that so many things in my life have changed has made me feel like taking up my blog again would really help me express and use my energy in a more productive way. So this is me, apologizing for disappearing and asking you all to forgive me and bear with me while I return to something I love to do.

It'll be a slow process, but I'm excited to get back into the blogging community that I love so much.
Speak to you all soon!

xoxo